THE 5 TYPES OF PEOPLE IN THE LIBRARY

Its that time again - E X A M season

One of the worse seasons of all time. The libraries are full - all the tables, study lamps and computers are fully occupied. People are eyeing one another, eyeing each and every one of those computers and seats, waiting to jump in once the student leaves the premises. The exam season is swamped with students and now, even full of students who don't even go to your university! Everyone is desperate for a table in university. Floors and floors of books, hormones, laughter, whispers, food, trash, hoes,  bros you name it.

To me, finals acts as a metaphor for the union of students. There are familiar faces, not so familiar faces, faces that you last saw back in first year of university, faces you probably glanced at at XOYO, there are those gorgeous faces you want to see because they give you motivation to study and there are those faces you just want to avoid.

From what I've gathered over the years, is that there are 5 types of people that you would probably come across in the Library of your university during this crucial time of your academic life. To be fair, the list is endless, but for your sake, I narrowed it down to the best five people who are on that #Clublib grind.

(1) The  nesters

Lets start the list with something subtle - The nesters. The nesters are students who constantly sit at the exact same spot everyday. They are picky and want to sit near the toilet so that they can pee, near the water cooler so that they can fill their bottles, near the window so that they can get natural light because desk lights are a waste of energy. You see them all the time at the same old spot. You arrive at the library at quarter past 8 in the morning and you see them there (at the same spot) in full blown library grind. You leave the library at 1 am and you still see them sat there at the same spot, concentrating like crazy burning the midnight oil.

What keeps these students going?

Food. 

lots of it

Exhibit A

Look what we have here. In the picture below we see a nester, nesting in its natural habitat, surrounded by food, stationaries, and necessities in order to pull through the night of hard core studying. Look at the amount of food on that table - that my friends, is a lifetime supply of junk food. 

How to spot a nester after library hours?

Check the floor of the library and find the trail of crisps or popcorn on the floor. I can bet 100% that that trail will lead you to your treasure; the nester. When you're bored in the library and need a little fun time down time, go find that trail Glenn Coco. It only obvious that nesters need a lot of space.  It takes a lot to be a nester don't get me wrong. The nester starter pack consists of practically everything you have lying around in your room/ house namely food, stationaries, laptop, coat, hair dryer, portable fan, makeup bag handbag. You also need a strong back to carry your heavy 7 kg backpack. These bad boys are prepared and are ready for anything. If a zombie apocalypse were to happen, they wouldn't have to worry. 

Despite that, they are able to stay in the library for long hours without feeling restless and deprived of food.

Good job

gg

(2) The  Library Pretenders

Moving on the the next people you might come across in the library - the Library Pretenders. They are those who come into university with the rest of their friends or just like any other student during the exam period but they end up not getting any work done. Library pretenders tend to take long hour  breaks and seem to always be asking everyone whether they need anything from "Tesco" just to escape studying in the library. You might think they are doing work on their computers since they are attentively focusing on the screen, but don't be fooled my friends. Thats only a gimmick. What they are really doing is procrastinating - practically surfing the internet,  watching videos on youtube, Facebook etc. 

Exhibit B

Caught red handed! Here we have our first library pretender. I took a sneaky little picture of candidate B watching a youtube video when candidate B was supposed to be studying. Naughty naughty

Library pretenders need to be where the other people are as they have the serious case of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). They somewhat feel obliged to be in the library. The thought of missing out on library break gossip fears them. During the exam season, students  create this union , I call it #ClubLib. For some odd reason, you hear more rumours and gossip about people during this particular period rather than the rest of the academic year! Weird. This is the time you hear things like  

"Did you see boy A with girl B?"

"oh my god, so rude, that girl just told me to shut up - who does she think she is?"

(3) The creepers

The creepers are usually boys. But today, they can be girls as well. Creepers could be a one man team or they could be a group of creepers. Creepers are basically people who perv on others in the library or the ones who like to people watch. Constantly scanning the room and observing people a.k.a. finding their next prey. Lets face it, we are all guilty of staring at others sometimes too, especially at the good looking ones. 

They know that anyone who is anyone would likely be in the library at least once a week during the exam period therefore it would  a great chance for them to perv on cute guys and girls at the study area. They would plan their seat at the study area so that the proximity between them and the other cute "victim" would not be too close. The preys wouldn't sit close to their victims, instead they will sit further away but close enough to make sneaky eye contact with them. Their main aim is to flirt their way into friendship with a long term goal of getting a phone number or being friends on Facebook by the end of exams.

These people are such professionals when it comes to stalking. Being in a Business School, yeah sure you learn the theories; SWOT, PORTERS 5 Forces and what not. But really, you wouldn't have guessed what else these business students learn behind closed doors. The art of stalking. The lengths people would do to simply "stalk" someone. Normal people stalk people on Facebook and Instagram, and maybe even google their names on Google but business school students stalk people on LinkedIn L O L #thingsyoulearninbusinessschool. I mean if there was a skill for stalking people on LinkedIn, i'll be the first person to endorse them.

**Picture unavailable - cause my ass might get beaten up by them haha**

(4)The  Oblivious vs.  The  Noise Patrols

I don't think I have to explain the name of this next one any further. These are the ones who just don't get it. Their loudness level can go from 0 to 100 real quick! In this case, or any case to be frank, headphones are essential when it comes to long hours in the library. Even 5 minutes count. You need them to survive and stand your "table" ground. Without them, you would probably suffer form the annoying whispers, loud chomps, keypad stabbing, coughs and loud page flips. 

Here we are going to talk about the oblivious and the noise patrols. I feel like these two categories of people go well together. The oblivious makes tones of noise - they just don't get why people think they are making so much noise. Then we have the noise patrols. Students that are so iffy about every single noise make. I swear these people would even look up if you breathe loud enough near them. Usually, they are the ones who don't have their headphones with them. Sensitive to sound, they are on a hunt to identify the oblivious in the library.

Noise patrols start off by identifying the oblivious. Once they've done that, the try to initiate something by giving them the single tensed eye ball stare.

Exhibit C

*Girl A and B whispers*

*Girl C turns and gives them the single tensed eye ball*

If that does not work, don't fret, they have other strategies up their sleeves. They would go in with strategy B, the turn stare and turn away. Strategy C, rolling the eyes while looking directly at the person making noise. Strategy D, make long ass eye contact till people around you feel uncomfortable and nasty strategy E, simply telling them to shut up. The library is like a war zone when these kind of people are sat in such close proximity. You can actually feel the on going tension between them. Speaking from experience, it is not a case you want to experience.

(5) The Kiasu 

Ahhhhhhhh, the kiasu. Every asian person is familiar with this word. Growing up in an asian family in Asia, this world lingers as an everyday word. Based on the definition in the Urban dictionary (wow I'm surprised that it is actually defined in the urban dictionary - times have really changed haha)

Before, thinking that Asians were the kiasu kings and queens of the nerd world, I clearly didn't meet the west side. The kiasus are the ones who make others uncomfortable by saying that they are going to "fail" in an exam. They are the ones who burn the midnight oil and study till the am yet they are the ones who are freaking out the most, panicking everyone around them by going "I have no time to study" when they have practically 12657 days till their next paper. Usually, people get annoyed with students like these. they study so much and would come up to you and say that they have no time to study. Like c'mon you get good grades still. Sad to say, but I am a kiasu. Soz guys but I am asian and I grew up in a competitive surrounding. You have to be kiasu to survive that asian culture.

Thats is only the first type of kiasu. The second type of kiasu are those study secretly study but tell people they don't. Yup, I've seen and heard a lot about this. That I don't get. Why would you tell other people you don't study and don't care about exams WHEN YOU DO???? Motive????? Really???? not sure why they do that or what they are trying to prove or portray.